People think “being funny” is some gift, you’re either born with it or you’re not. Wrong! Humor is a craft, and like any craft it can be studied, drilled, and perfected. At Funny School, we’ll run you through our 12 Core Principles of Comedy until they’re muscle memory…
- Adding “-gate” to the end of any minor controversy that happened in your friend group in 2021 - “I just don’t know if we can trust Ava after Bucatini-gate” 
 
- Adding “-big” before any emerging industry - “Big Oat Milk runs this town.” 
 
- Saying “asking for a friend” when you’re really asking for something embarrassing for yourself - “Anybody know how to get ranch out of a duvet cover… asking for a friend” 
 
- Calling a Diet Coke a “fridge cig” - In certain instances, calling coffee “bean juice” can also be funny, but use this one sparingly 
 
- Using hand clap emojis between every word for emphasis - Stop 👏 sending 👏 voice 👏 notes 👏 
 
- Thanking a former Democratic President for something inconvenient that happened to you personally - “Just had to pay $3 extra for guac… Thanks, Biden.” 
 
- Adding “-head” or “-hive” to the end of anything you are a fan of - “Oh, I’m an OG Meg-head” (Meghan Trainor) 
 
- Refering to your pet as your dependent, roommate, or coworker - “My roommate peed on the carpet again. (It’s my dog.)” 
 
- Using business speak to describe your alcohol dependency - “Pivoting from “dry January” to “moist March.” 
- “Touching base with my liver. It’s not good.” 
 
- Adding “Mc-” before any phrase to describe a friend - “McDingDong over here thinks Baja Fresh is better than Taco Bell…” 
 
- Calling your partner a “virgin” immediately after coitus - “Nice job out there, virgin” 
 
- Mentioning a new type of milk that does exist, or doesn’t exist - “I’m all about doughnut milk these days” 
 
If, after mastering all 12 of our Core Principles, your friends still don’t find you funny, you can pay us more money, and enroll in our advanced courses. The curriculum includes…
- Contemporary Meme Theory 
- Applied Bit Commitment 
- Joke CPR 
- Prank Ethics: Punching Up, Down, and Sideways 
- Callback Criticism: Outing the Inside Joke 
- “That’s What She Said” 1011 
“That’s What She Said” 210 is available in Spring semesters, only to students who have already completed “That’s What She Said” 101.



i'm running with the doughnut milk bit
I'm enrolling for fall...